The lie women love to hear

Okay, I’m back because I’ve been gone too long that I started to miss this blog. I’ve been so caught up with life that I lost track of some of the things that matter most to me, writing being one of them. To be completely honest, I felt unmotivated for a while due to the fact that people are too lazy to even read anymore. Well my friends, I’ve found new ways to push this blog and they seem to work. I would like to talk about something that I’ve noticed trending amongst my female friends for a while. I call it, “The biggest lie woman love.”

Before I proceed, I would like to make one thing clear; I’m not talking about every woman, just a large percentage of them. I’ve categorized many of my female friends into three categories; the teen that’s in love, the wild girl in her twenties and the desperate woman approaching or in her 30’s.

It’s unfortunate to admit that relationships have lost value in recent decades. Yet women are in love with the title that states they’re in a relationship. Somewhere along the lines someone told them that once they obtained that title, all their problems and concerns would be solved.

Take it from a man when I tell you this is not true, it’s false, it’s a lie and it most definitely doesn’t mean you’re save from being disappointed. There’s a few things women love to hear even if they might not be true, “I love you.” Saying those three magical words creates this atmosphere that makes you believe you’re in a fairyland. But love doesn’t grow on trees over night; you need a foundation to even consider being in love.

Isn’t a foundation what most of these relationships are missing? I see new couples saying it within weeks, or a couple of months. I ask all my close friends and myself how can you even say you’re in love without even knowing a person. How can you be in love with someone you’ve never seen at his or her worse? I’ve never understood how people can go from relationship to relationship saying “I love you” like it’s that simple.

The truth is that women want to hear it and a large amount of men are willing to say it in order to get what they want. Men want to get in your pants and you don’t want to seem easy. Therefore a lot of women make their selves believe that if they have a title, it’s okay.

“Nothing is going to happen if we’re not in a relationship,” she said. Well, men thought of a better idea. Why not lie to them and make them believe a lie to make it that much easier. “Okay, you want a relationship? You’re now my girlfriend and within now and six months, I’m going to get rid of you.”

Some relationships are worth having right? To some women the title is more important than a solid foundation. Even when the relationship is completely garbage, they want to be able to tell the world, “That’s my man right there.”

If you’re mouth is open, I suggest you close it. This is the reality many women are oblivious too. I reiterate that this is not true in all cases, but if you pay attention, you will notice that I’m telling you the truth. This is the lie that many women like to believe and love to hear as harsh as it might sound. How do I know this? Well I’ve seen it around me a lot, I know guys that do it often. We’ve been through this before, you say all men, I reply not true. This is indeed the case when you force the issue, when you want to make someone property by force.

The teen in love is a girl learning about love, we’ll know that girl who was madly in love when she was in high school. She wrote all over her locker and binder. She had pictures of her boyfriend all over the place; it was kind of sickening at times. Despite of my opinion, it was her first love experience. A naïve girl who probably didn’t know that all things don’t last forever and in most cases has an imminent end.

This same girl got to her 20’s and decided to be young and wild, I call this girl the party animal that goes to Vegas every few weeks because she can. The last thing on her mind is a relationship. In her early 20’s all she wants to do is party without much care and pretty reckless. “Oh, he’s so cute,” says the sloppy drunk being carried out, barfing all over her dress as she stumbles outside of the club.

When her 20’s come to an end she starts to notice that everyone around her is getting married therefore she panics. She also wants to get married, wants to have a kid, starts to suffocate any man that enters her life. In her mind time is ticking, she’s getting old and the clock is running. All of this didn’t matter when she was younger and in the club scene. She wants a relationship; she wants the title, now she says she doesn’t want to play any more games because she’s not a kid anymore. Her smart friends chose relationships instead of the nightclubs.

Well, we can argue that this is true for a large amount of women out there. Each experience is different and every woman has a different story, but the one I’m telling you seems to be trending with my generation. “Use me as long as I can call you my boyfriend in order to avoid being judge by my girlfriends.” It basically tells us men, I rather be in a fake three-month relationship than in a dating stage where we’re getting to know each other. By no means does dating mean to sleep with anyone, that’s a decision you have to make yourself.

I personally don’t believe in jumping from relationship to relationship, I believe in being honest and upfront. Let the other person know what your plans and goals are from the beginning. Sometimes it might be the best thing to do, in other cases it might be the worse because living a lie might be more sufficient at the time. Am I lying? This is the lie most women love to hear.

Thank you for reading now share it on your favorite social media site.

Picture credit: Google.com

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The hopeless romantic syndrome

If you haven’t noticed, I’ve been missing for a few weeks. Not by personal choice if you’re truly wondering. The feeling of being computer less is like walking naked in public, you can feel something is missing, (clothes in that case.) My fingers have been aching to touch a real keyboard, one that is not touch screen or on my phone. I love, love, love to stay in touch with the outer world. I couldn’t live without all of you who follow my blogs. Okay, maybe I’m taking it a step too far with all the sentimental expressions.

Have you ever asked yourself what a hopeless romantic is? Are you a hopeless romantic? You know, the type of person who is in love with being in love. Yes, I’m sure you have plenty of those friends. Nowadays there’s no way to hide from them, they pollute your social news feed every day. Well, at least they believe they’re hopeless romantics.

Many people argue that being a hopeless romantic is the equivalent of believing in chivalry. For some is a notion that no longer exist, for others is simply something you truly have to search hard and long for. Let’s be real here, the hopeless romantics these days have turned out to be a bunch of phonies. They claim to live a hopeless romantic lifestyle but their actions demonstrate quite the opposite.

If you’re wondering, yes I’m talking about the one’s that say and live different lifestyles on the weekends. This is indeed for all of them. The reality is that most alleged hopeless romantics are women; therefore I must be speaking of them in a grand majority.

Is very easy to alter an image with the words that best describe the person you are trying to portray. I’ve personally never considered a person that jumps from relationship to relationship a hopeless romantic. Quite the contrary, these type of persons are the ones I consider needy, the same one’s that need someone to validate their existence.

You think of a hopeless romantic and you think of a chick flick, the movies that always have a character that best fits the profile. It personally reminds me of a friend that actually reads my blog, one that fell in love across the world because she was tired of dealing with the unmannered, douche bags we have in the United States.  This friend fell in love in Europe out of all places in the world. She did the traveling thing every few weeks. Unfortunately her love story was cut short, it was one of those loves that couldn’t be. Although my intention is not to get into her story, it’s the actions that bring up the comparison.

The term hopeless romantic has numerous definitions, to be in love with being in love all the way to believing in fairy tales.  Love can strike at any given time (so they say) and for my good friend it just happened to be across the world. When I listen to her describe the emotions she feels by simply reminiscing on the memories, I can picture what a hopeless romantic might really be.

On the contrary of other people I see changing relationships every few months. “I’m in love with him, he’s the best.” That only last a few months while there’s a change and it’s a different person they’re talking about. “I’ve searched for you my entire life, thank God you finally came.” Yes, I personally think those are the people who are a little confused.

How can you claim to love someone you hardly know anything about? How can you say you love someone when you haven’t seen him or her at his or her worse? Yet again as long as some people get everything they’re looking for, it might not matter. Superficial love is the new hopeless romantic.  Well that can be argue in most cases, love seems to have lost valued the past couple of decades. It has become extremely easy to say, “ I love you.” Once upon a time the desire to be in love was at its peak, today all you need is a month or two in order to say you’ve found your prince charming.

If that doesn’t cut it, you now have a new generation of women who claim to be hopeless romantics but are in relationships with douche bags or machistas. Indeed this group of woman is hopeless, but not romantic in case you’re wondering. We can see that this group is hopelessly stupid. Every woman does have a prince charming, one that will treat her right, but is not one that you can fabricate. To be a hopeless romantic might mean many things nowadays, it should also include being a little smarter.

We all want to find that person that completes us or compliments our lives. We want that person that makes us feel like our search for a soul mate has ended. With that said, this doesn’t mean we have to fall in love with every person that comes in to our present. Who made that rule up? Shouldn’t a man earn your love before you hand it out like a lollipop? Well at least that’s my opinion and everyone is entitles to do and act as they please. In other words, “Follow your heart.” If you like to be disappointed often, than perhaps you’re taking all the right steps.

This is what I postulate; we’ll have a little hopeless romantic in us. Others simply believe that they know what love is when in fact they have no idea.  Most people that claim to be hopeless romantics on a daily basis are seeking attention. They’re extremely repugnant.  Despite all that, I can respect the courage it takes to pretend they know and understand what they preach to the world. If you guys open your eyes you will start to notice these people who declare their one-month love to the universe.

Nice to see all you guys once again!!! Feel free to share this blog on your favorite social media site.

Opposite sex best friends

Nowadays it’s dubious to see a men and a women have a clean, untarnished friendship. With that said, can men and women really be friends or better said, can they be best friends?

This is conceivably the issue with a high percentage of couples today. Therefore I ask, can opposite genders really maintain a strict friendship. It’s permitted to have a best friend, what becomes a problem is having a best friend of the opposite sex. The thought of two people hooking up, or something simply not looking right, always comes up in relationships.

Boys will be boys that’s why this blog is only for fully grown men. I’ll get to the point and take off from there. Yes, it’s possible to have a best friend of the opposite sex. Many factors do come in between but if you’re asking yourself if it can be done, well let me hit a few key points, thoughts and examples.

Machismo is a very common lifestyle for Latin men all over the world. Yet again, machismo has transcendent worldwide. The belief that “I wear the pants and I’m the man of the house, therefore you do what I say,” type of mentality. It’s specifically this type of men that can’t see their female partners in a healthy friendship with the opposite sex. Their DNA doesn’t function that way, not by choice but because they were raised that way.

Usually people get into relationships and you’ll never hear from them again, that’s because people try to avoid jeopardizing their new relationship. But what happens to the best friend when you’re in a relationship. Where do you leave the person who’s been there when you needed someone to listen to your problems and complaints. I’m talking about opposite gender best friends. Are you suppose to shut them out and erase them from your life in order to keep your new boyfriend/girlfriend happy? If this is what you’ve done in the past, you’re probably a terrible friend.

Every relationship should have 100 percent trust in the beginning. Obviously as the bad choices accumulate, the percentage in your trust scale begins to decline. Despite all this, opposite sex friendships should not jeopardize anyone because your relationship should always have 100 percent trust. If you’ve made bad choice after bad choice, you’ve simply put yourself in a bad position.

I personally have a female best friend, I call her my diary because I’m allowed to confess my entire life without being judged. The person I go to when I need someone to listen or give me advice. Their’s more pros than cons in these relationships, you get all the inside information on the opposite sex. As questionable as it might seem to certain people, the line of respect is always drawn. No one should doubt your ability to make the right choices even when you’re in an uncomfortable situation. Reason why, because at the end of the day the call is always yours.

Finding that opposite sex best friend isn’t a simple task, that friend that likes you for who you are and not for what you have. No, you shouldn’t have to pick and choose between friends and relationships. On the contrary, your partner and yourself have to respect if a friendship was already established prior to the existence of your current or future relationship. Remember that this is only my opinion and you might disagree with me completely which is okay.

We can say this is the adult way of observing this dilemma. As confusing as it might appear, this problem seems to keep going on today in the 21st century. Ridiculous? yes it is but what can you do when people fail to understand that we live in a new time and era.

A best friend symbolizes a special bond and connection. Doesn’t necessarily mean you as boyfriend or girlfriend can’t compensate for everything that goes on in the relationship. We all need room and venting space at times, that’s why best friends were made. I’ve personally surround myself with woman because I love to know what’s going on in the female brain, my female friends might agree when I say that I’m always one or two steps ahead of the game. This has all been possible due to the fact that I have a female best friend and very close special women in my life.

The machismo mentality is old fashion but old habits die hard as some might say. Every relationship should have equal or close to equal pull. Insecurities are a sign of weakness in a person. No one should make you feel uncomfortable because what’s yours is yours and no one can take that away. If there’s one thing I’ve learned, is the fact that when people have malice intent there’s no holding them back. If your boyfriend or girlfriend wants to cheat on you, they will find a way to do it even if you believe you got everything under control.

The problem has never been having a best friend of the opposite sex. The problem will always be that you’re dating someone with insecurities and a machismo mentality. You might not believe it but people can actually change. When someone wants to keep you in their life, they will find a way to change over a period of time of course. If they choose not to, your answer is right there in front of you.

There’s a difference between an existing best friend and a new emerging best friend which might be a little more difficult to understand or justify. It’s okay to make new friends, what will always matter here is the amount of trust handed out. If you can’t deal with it, perhaps you’re in the wrong relationship.

Embrace your opposite sex best friend but always remember that a line has to be drawn. People in this situation already know this and understand that it’s not worth loosing a friendship over a bad decision. “Why can’t we be friends, why can’t we be friends!!!”

Thank you for reading, please feel free to share this in your favorite social media site by clicking below. Follow me on Twitter: @mlinares10

The douche bag

If you’ve ever wondered why the men you date are douche bags, let me try to touch surface this Monday. When Google, Bing or the internet doesn’t supply me with the answers I seek, I write a blog to keep you folks entertained. As a young man, I’ve come to learn the in and outs of the male mind when it comes to women. This doesn’t mean I’m an expert on the field but I am very knowledgeable on the topic.

I’ve come to realize that if there’s one thing women really love about myself, is the bluntness when it comes to talking about men. The number of my female friends who seek a harsh but honest answer always increases. To the point where some of the woman I’ve dated in the past still keep in touch and often call with questions. Yes, concerns about their new guys and things that might be happening. Believe me when I say that this was not something I had planned for myself five years ago. Nonetheless, It’s something I’ve began to really enjoy because It also helps me learn and validate the things I already know.

I’m not the perfect man therefore I suggest you hold on before you write me that email asking for a date (joke.) One of my good buddies recently called telling me how she got stood up by a douche bag, yes, she waited and he never showed up. I personally wanted to see the guy just to punch him in the face, no women or men should ever have to put up with a situation of that sort. Then I remembered that I can’t get in any of that type of trouble if I want to seek a career in my field.

Why are douche bags douches?

There’s really not a specific definition, everyone has a different explanation specially woman because they deal with them the most. Douche bags could be defined as pompous an egotistical. You don’t have to be a good looking guy to be a douche bag, that’s perhaps a big misconception out in the real world. Douche bags like to believe they’re are God’s gift to the earth. Although there’s a few type of people that fall in to this category, douche bags are up there on the list. Douche bags like to be the smart and funny guy who believes he’s better than everyone else. Have you ever met a guy that likes to make fun of people, or other guys? Yes, the one that thinks he’s cooler than the rest of the group because he has things no one else has, likes to show off and rub it in people’s faces in a negative way. Are you picturing this guy? That’s Mr. Douche bag believe it or not.

But why are guys douche bags to women?

Women don’t make douche bags, these boys (because boys is what they are) earn that title with the guys. If you were a boy scout or a girl scout you know you have to earn badges which you proudly wear. Well my friends, that douche bag badge is up their in the hierarchy table of men. Now why are they that way with women? The following is no top secret, it’s perhaps the worse kept secret that many of us tend to ignore. Douche bags like to feel powerful and in control at all times. I’ve never met a down to earth guy who’s a douche bag, that would be ironic if you ask me.

The douche bag always wants to dictate the paste and never really gives in to demands. Most importantly, douche bags are or can’t be honest with the women they date. Always leading them on, telling them that things are moving in a certain direction when it’s truly not. Douche bags can’t be honest and some women simply can’t decipher the codes that sit right in front of them. A man that can’t call or text a woman to tell her he’s not making a set date for whatever reason is a giant douche. I can’t call this type of male a man at all, these are boys in a mens body.

Honesty can take you far in life but some douche bags couldn’t be honest even if their life depended on it. A man that doesn’t have the decency to be upfront about things can’t really be called a man, that’s why they’re douche bags. Yet again, there’s always time to change but of course douche bags will resist. Why? Because in their mind, they are right and you are wrong. It’s the cool thing to do so there’s no reason to change it.

You love them…

Okay, now we know what makes a douche bag and we also know how they think to a certain degree. Despite all of those things you still love them. Something about them you like and can’t find anywhere else. You keep blaming these guys because of the way they’re but you’re the one who seems to always seek the same trades in a men. A douche bag will go as far as you let them go. There’s a difference between a men who tells you his clear intentions and one who leads you in the wrong direction. That’s like walking with a blindfold over your eyes and simply following directions. There’s different degrees of douche, you can’t judge them all by the same meter. The only thing you do control is how far you let a douche go on.

If the men hasn’t changed out of his own free will, don’t expect him to change by some divine intervention. A douche bag doesn’t aspire to change, they always want to keep the party going and as soon as you get that through your head, you will see the light. I know too many girls who date douche bags, (Girls because women date men and not boys.) This blog has made me a lot of new friends and followers, yet again it has also led many people to dislike me because of the things I talk about. I’m not in it for the fame or to make new friends, I’m it to write and speak my mind, if you don’t like the truth that’s too bad. Let’s hope we touched the surface in a complex topic that many of you ladies have found yourselves confounded by. Remember, douche bags are that way by choice, if you are dating one is also by choice and by choice you will also suffer the consequences.

Feel free to share by clicking on your favorite social media site down below, until next time. Follow me on Twitter: @mlinares10

I want a relationship

Relationships can be defined as reaching the promise land for many woman, the commitment they’ve searched and looked for. Yet sometimes because there’s a title between two people, doesn’t signify you’ve found success. So you want a relationship huh?

“Oh, why can’t I find the person of my dreams? are all men players? why are they all the same?” Without a doubt some of the most popular lines you will hear a single woman say often. Yes, the same woman you see partying and getting wasted every Friday, Saturday and Sunday even Thursdays when the mood is right.

“I need a man who will value me and spoil me and treat me like a queen because that’s what I’ am and if you’re not that man, I don’t care to meet you.” I will tell you exactly what I heard, “Let me see your car, wallet, bank statements and by the way what do you do for a living?” Woman want to be loved, don’t we all?

At one point in our life, we all look for that partner, that relationship that will fill that empty space someone left vacant. Well actually we start to look for it after we enjoy our single life to the point we get sick of it. Than you have those people who can’t be out of a relationship. Some of you that are currently single are probably saying, “Yea right buddy! I’m going to be single until I’m 40.” If you’re actually in your teenage years or in your early 20’s, that might be the mentality you have at the moment. My suggestion would be to speak to someone single in their 30’s or 40’s  and ask if they feel the same way. The answer will most likely be “HECK NO.”

I will restrain myself from using the word love because like I’ve told you before, love doesn’t grow on trees, it takes time to develop those kind of feelings. Relationships on the other hand come and go and certain people use them like underwear, always changing them. How do you choose your partner? Are you using online dating? you cheeky little devil, you are aren’t you? Don’t lie, I won’t tell anyone I promise. Wait, you don’t believe in that, you met all your previous boyfriends while you were partying and you fell in love. That’s probably reason why you’re here once again looking for a new one.

Where do I find that person?

I will tell you where you shouldn’t find them if that’s more helpful, let’s begin:

The Club

Strip Club

Las Vegas                                   

MySpace

Facebook 

Jail

(Off the top my of my head, add yours here ——–>)

There’s a few exceptions to the places I mentioned above, if you meet a person on Facebook or Myspace or Instagram for example, you need some mutual friends in between. It will be the safe thing to do and you can actually do some investigative searching on the person you’re interested in. With that said, you would be doing online dating, if that’s okay with you, go for it. Las Vegas would be risky business both ways, sin city is a gamble, therefore roll the dice and see if you get lucky, just don’t roll snake eyes.

Why are you picking on women?

I’m not, just pay close attention and see what gender is constantly asking for a partner. Men want partners as well, they simply like showing that tough side, that “I don’t need anyone,” (Macho voice.) Depending on the age of a male, of course you think about sharing your experiences with someone. Boys in their teens or early 20‘s are only thinking about one thing, SEX. I would be really careful if I was a woman, around one in ten men that age probably think different. It takes a lot to catch young men,the issue is that it can’t just be anyone, it has to be a special one. I use to think that only men liked to have their options open when it came to dating, it so happens that nowadays women have adopted the believe. They get so caught up on the thought that they let the good one’s get away.

This is just not about men or women, it goes for both genders equally. You can’t claim to want a partner in life and show the world another face. Yes, compatibility and physical attraction is crucial, it’s the first thing we notice in another person. Thus far, looks have never really guaranteed you success in a relationship. The goal is to always find the balance in between.

Where are you going with this?

If you want a relationship that will be worth the time spent, I would suggest you check your priorities. Stop stating what you want with words and start showing it with action. Dating and relationships are two very different things, not everyone you date will make it to your relationship category. Not that is a waste of your time, it’s truly an experience to keep learning what you really want while you’re still single. Relationships, they’re not easy or simple, they’re tough rugged and draining but when you find that person, you’ll become content with you search journey. This is not an indication to stand static and wait for your dream person, you’ll meet him/her as you keep walking forward when you least expect it.

Here’s  a good one

When you date someone, you’re actually showing interest, you’re getting to know a person and contemplating the idea of a relationship. It doesn’t mean it will happen but the possibility will be there. Just don’t expect love out of dating a person, that’s one of the biggest mistakes people tend to make, when it’s time to let go, simply walk away. This is the perfect time to cut your losses short and take whatever you can from the experience. Relationships, you won’t find them in the club you will find them with time. You have to give time some time to do what it does best. Now that we got that out of the way, stop with the complaining already.

Thank you for reading, feel free to share on your social media site of preference down below and follow me on Twitter: @mlinares10