Opposite sex best friends

Nowadays it’s dubious to see a men and a women have a clean, untarnished friendship. With that said, can men and women really be friends or better said, can they be best friends?

This is conceivably the issue with a high percentage of couples today. Therefore I ask, can opposite genders really maintain a strict friendship. It’s permitted to have a best friend, what becomes a problem is having a best friend of the opposite sex. The thought of two people hooking up, or something simply not looking right, always comes up in relationships.

Boys will be boys that’s why this blog is only for fully grown men. I’ll get to the point and take off from there. Yes, it’s possible to have a best friend of the opposite sex. Many factors do come in between but if you’re asking yourself if it can be done, well let me hit a few key points, thoughts and examples.

Machismo is a very common lifestyle for Latin men all over the world. Yet again, machismo has transcendent worldwide. The belief that “I wear the pants and I’m the man of the house, therefore you do what I say,” type of mentality. It’s specifically this type of men that can’t see their female partners in a healthy friendship with the opposite sex. Their DNA doesn’t function that way, not by choice but because they were raised that way.

Usually people get into relationships and you’ll never hear from them again, that’s because people try to avoid jeopardizing their new relationship. But what happens to the best friend when you’re in a relationship. Where do you leave the person who’s been there when you needed someone to listen to your problems and complaints. I’m talking about opposite gender best friends. Are you suppose to shut them out and erase them from your life in order to keep your new boyfriend/girlfriend happy? If this is what you’ve done in the past, you’re probably a terrible friend.

Every relationship should have 100 percent trust in the beginning. Obviously as the bad choices accumulate, the percentage in your trust scale begins to decline. Despite all this, opposite sex friendships should not jeopardize anyone because your relationship should always have 100 percent trust. If you’ve made bad choice after bad choice, you’ve simply put yourself in a bad position.

I personally have a female best friend, I call her my diary because I’m allowed to confess my entire life without being judged. The person I go to when I need someone to listen or give me advice. Their’s more pros than cons in these relationships, you get all the inside information on the opposite sex. As questionable as it might seem to certain people, the line of respect is always drawn. No one should doubt your ability to make the right choices even when you’re in an uncomfortable situation. Reason why, because at the end of the day the call is always yours.

Finding that opposite sex best friend isn’t a simple task, that friend that likes you for who you are and not for what you have. No, you shouldn’t have to pick and choose between friends and relationships. On the contrary, your partner and yourself have to respect if a friendship was already established prior to the existence of your current or future relationship. Remember that this is only my opinion and you might disagree with me completely which is okay.

We can say this is the adult way of observing this dilemma. As confusing as it might appear, this problem seems to keep going on today in the 21st century. Ridiculous? yes it is but what can you do when people fail to understand that we live in a new time and era.

A best friend symbolizes a special bond and connection. Doesn’t necessarily mean you as boyfriend or girlfriend can’t compensate for everything that goes on in the relationship. We all need room and venting space at times, that’s why best friends were made. I’ve personally surround myself with woman because I love to know what’s going on in the female brain, my female friends might agree when I say that I’m always one or two steps ahead of the game. This has all been possible due to the fact that I have a female best friend and very close special women in my life.

The machismo mentality is old fashion but old habits die hard as some might say. Every relationship should have equal or close to equal pull. Insecurities are a sign of weakness in a person. No one should make you feel uncomfortable because what’s yours is yours and no one can take that away. If there’s one thing I’ve learned, is the fact that when people have malice intent there’s no holding them back. If your boyfriend or girlfriend wants to cheat on you, they will find a way to do it even if you believe you got everything under control.

The problem has never been having a best friend of the opposite sex. The problem will always be that you’re dating someone with insecurities and a machismo mentality. You might not believe it but people can actually change. When someone wants to keep you in their life, they will find a way to change over a period of time of course. If they choose not to, your answer is right there in front of you.

There’s a difference between an existing best friend and a new emerging best friend which might be a little more difficult to understand or justify. It’s okay to make new friends, what will always matter here is the amount of trust handed out. If you can’t deal with it, perhaps you’re in the wrong relationship.

Embrace your opposite sex best friend but always remember that a line has to be drawn. People in this situation already know this and understand that it’s not worth loosing a friendship over a bad decision. “Why can’t we be friends, why can’t we be friends!!!”

Thank you for reading, please feel free to share this in your favorite social media site by clicking below. Follow me on Twitter: @mlinares10

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Do you have a Facebook, Twitter, Instagram?

“But you didn’t have to cut me offfffffff, erase me from your FB, Twitter, Instagram, like we weren’t nothing! and I don’t even need your account but you treat me like a stranger and it feels so rough, now you’re just somebody that I use to know!” (Song credit: Somebody that I use to know)

You live in a new day and age where what really matters is how updated with technology and the internet you’re.

The truth is that in 2012 who doesn’t have a Facebook, Twitter or Instagram around the world? Is the new thing to do. Throughout my adventures around the globe, if there’s one thing that I’ve realized, is that everyone and their ‘mama’ has a Facebook, true fact.

Facebook and other sites have become such a big part of our lives that we no longer ask for phone numbers, we ask for Facebook, Twitter and Instagram accounts to name a few. Nowadays we usually end a conversation the following way: “It was nice meeting you, do you have a Facebook?.” Ten years ago we were still asking for those seven digits.

The feeling of the chase was a thrilling and exuberating to any teenager and adult but with our latest generation, that trend is becoming simply a flash from the past. There’s hardly any more, “I’m going after him/her because that’s what I want, even if it came at the cost of a rejection. (The Law of attraction, we can talk about that in a future blog.)

Let’s get something clear, this is not about having accounts on more than one website, it’s about how we’ve allowed these sites to ruin the way we socialize and meet people. It has damped the mentality many of us grew up with. It has annihilated the way many of our parents and grandparents did things 50 years ago.

I myself go back in retrospect and remember attending many parties where ending with one number was considered a successful night. Phone numbers have diminished in value to the new generations, some of you might disagree, but the facts are right there in front of you.

In the old days……

Obtaining a number from a person was considered important, numbers weren’t handed out so easily, for example; you had to really impress a girl to get her number. Girls would also make you wait, or would have to see you a few times in order to give you the seven numbers to her cell phone.

Today…..

Most people like handing out their FaceBook, Twitter or Instagram account, it’s the new trend. I remember talking to a friend, (female friend) who told me that it would be much easier to reach her on Facebook than by phone (rejection.)

The thing about handing out your Facebook, Twitter or Instagram is that you also hand out a part of your private life out. By giving out your Facebook, I now have access to your everyday and weekend life. I can see what you are like on the weekends without you telling me much, ‘a picture can say a million words.’ In this case, we can say that a lot of pictures can say way more than that.

This is where Instagram comes in, a site where some people practically post every move they make. This is what I ate, this is where I’m going, this is the quotes I like. I’m a big on the quotes, for some reason I like to inspire the people around me. Back to the point; As hard as it might be to accept it, our ways of socializing keeps evolving everyday and not for the best in some cases. This has indeed led millions to become couch potatoes.

Your post….

Let’s not lie to each other here, we tend to sometimes put our mood, feelings and current state of mind in some of our post. Even when some of them make us sound pretty crazy. Sometimes post tend to show true character, have you ever seen your friend talking about their ex BF/GF in a real negative way? It happens, it’s very common. I hear Facebook has become the new MySpace, whatever that means.

Like my best friend usually tells me when we talk about the topic, “God forbid you delete some one from Facebook, it’s like stabbing them in the heart, back,” you get where I’m going with that. “She blocked me!”

One of my favorite……

When people post quotes, or a simple sentence that stirs controversy, people start to question whether that was an indirect comment for them. Oh yes, the power of Facebook, if only you would’ve thought twice before giving them your account. I actually forgot you can put your number on Facebook as part of your description, I recall a girl calling me once:

Me: Hello?

Girl: Hey Moses, where’s the party at?

Me: How did you get my number?

Girl: I got it through your FB page.

Me: What?

Girl: So what’s the address?

It might sound a little bit crazy yet again we control the amount of information we share with others and sometimes that might be a little too much. But thank you Facebook for that memorable moment.

Back to the Phone…..

Can you truly say people would know that much information about you if you would’ve just gave them your number? I mean, you can easily say “No.” Many girls would do that before Facebook and other Social websites existed. I got plenty of “No, I have a boyfriend” back in the day. I won’t say that’s the situation nowadays, but it was once upon a time.

Not everyone is like that…..

Not all of us are like that, I must admit there are plenty of those who really like to keep their FB, Twitter and Instagram accounts very exclusive. Nevertheless, if you are looking for people who don’t answer your phone calls, I can assure you that you will find them on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram because who doesn’t have an account? Oh, I forgot about those friends who have relationship problems, therefore they terminate their accounts. But I’ll leave that for another week.

Better think about it next time, you can ignore a phone call or a text but you can’t hide from the internet. As for me, I think I’ll keep the chase alive for now. I still find it more exciting than following people online, Law of attraction, positive thinking, like someone once told me, “google it.”

See you next week or you can follow me on Twitter @mlinares10. Click on your social media site of preference.

Picture credit:
google.com